Not easy enough....

I sail through my life very silently enough now-a-days and enjoy every moment of it. Everything is nice, the thing is I don’t expect much from life and so it makes me happy in whatever I have. I have my dreams and my ambitions to realise and those are that matter the most. I never talk to anyone about what I actually feel like; it’s just through this medium that I try to express myself.

Brain to the heart says:

“But it’s so strange like many other things in life that I still remember you, and in my lone moments I am drowned deep into you. I want to change, and I am sure I don’t want to go back, but then why do I think about you. I don’t need you, I am logical enough to understand this world, and I have decided I don’t want your opinions in anything. The thing is very clear; I don’t want you back, but then why your thoughts come back to me? Why do I still adore the time we spent together? I hate you for all the things you did to me; you took away my sense of rationalisation when you taught me to love. You did a very bad job of nursing the hurt. I hated it absolutely, but then why I still think about those good old days?”

Me to the monster inside me:

“It’s really very strange, the people who hurt you, who because you more harm than anyone in this world, impact you like no one. That deep impact is a part of the learning process, which I don’t want to be a part of, but still this world and my heart gives me a push into in this part of the learning. When I am not interested in this part,  which teaches us to love, then why am I getting all kind of stupid encounters and people who happen to be a part of it, can anyone explain me this part?”

“No.” He says, that stupid moron yet again falls onto a different story, on that special part, gosh save me, and he continues (being indifferent to my attitude), “You can’t be explained except for the circumstances that will come your way, you have to find your own answers.”

“Means I’ll have to cook up a story for my own satisfaction by analysing those senseless intrusions in my life. I prefer to call then intrusions as they are nothing but useless stuff, with someone trying to change my mind and possibly convince me which is very much impossible. Don’t please give me a lecture yet again, you know how I feel and think, you are wise and can read my mind. I want to say one thing, leave me, leave my brain, leave my heart, and leave me alone in my own solitude. It’s not for these things but logical analysis of my everyday life and the achievements I foresee.”

“I won’t say anything; I have never tried to impose on you. I can read you fully. But it’s your learning mind at fault; tell me how you’ll control it? It’s like those crazy pointless worms on a platter, it’s your mind, and I am not a controller. Rest. I’ll leave you in your loving peace.” He chuckles.

I understand the fire in this mind and learning process of it will never leave me..... Even if I don’t want to be a part of it... God! It’s not that easy enough in this world!